1. You attract everything that happens to you. I can’t tell you how often clients ask me what they’re doing wrong to “attract” negative or less-than-perfect situations to their lives. This kind of thinking can lead to feelings of guilt, self-punishment, judgment, anxiety, fear and narcissism. An egotistical way to view life, which will lead to misery, is to make it all about you. When things aren’t going as you hope, instead of asking “what am I doing wrong?” ask, “what am I being asked to learn from this situation?” This places you in a true position of power and stops the victimization cycle. Life is filled with challenges. No matter how good and loving you strive to be, you’re not going to be immune to challenges. It’s a compliment. God knows you can handle challenges. God sends you people and situations who could benefit from your wisdom and healing, and people and situations that could help you heal and evolve your soul. When we’re in a receptive state to learn, we will be open to asking how we could help in a challenge or what we could learn from our hardships. De-personalize the details, and recognize the blessings. Gratitude lifts you to a higher state of being and thinking, which can help you get through challenges easier.
The law of attraction isn’t a magical thing and it’s not a simplistic theory. It’s a law of energy or physics. “Like attracts like” meaning what vibrates at similar rates (including one’s destiny) may be brought together through the time space continuum like how magnets feel that draw to connect. But what if something that doesn’t appear to be vibrating at your rate is sent your way? Does it mean you’ve dropped the ball and have done something wrong? Or is it part of your calling to teach, heal or learn from what’s sent your way? What if just because something doesn’t feel good or appear to make sense, it’s still vibrating at your rate because it’s connecting to a part of you that can teach or heal or that needs to learn or be healed? Consider the law of attraction like this: we are brought together with people and situations for a divine purpose. It’s not just about what your ego wants, it’s about the ripple effect of life and your soul’s purpose in this world. Sometimes our brain will interpret these interactions as wonderful, like when we’re brought together with people who are just like us. Other times our brain will interpret a situation as awful because it’s not making us happy. Either way, take a step back and learn from the situation. You’re being called to a higher purpose with it.
A helpful prayer to heal from any negative associations with the law of attraction is the Serenity Prayer:
God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference.
2. Your vision board is a magical universal shopping cart for your every desire. It’s my experience that vision boards are best used as a divine inspiration for your soul’s purpose and passion. Just because you place a photo of a supermodel on your vision board doesn’t mean you’ll ever look like or marry one. If you go deeper into your soul and ask yourself what would bring you peace, you may find the images on your vision board change. You may have photos of smiling faces representing happiness. Or strong bodies representing health. Or a yoga pose to inspire your practice. Or an image of water or mountains that you’d like a view of someday from where you live. You may place photos of things you’d like to give, as well as receive. When I was in high school it was about material things or life experiences that I wanted. As I grew up, I added ways I would love to serve others and help this planet. It’s been most fulfilling to experience these service goals coming true – the board serving as inspiration of what’s possible and to help keep me motivated and focused. When my efforts and passion meet with divine timing, the vision on the board becomes my reality.
So don’t lack faith if you never live in that 10-bedroom mansion overlooking the ocean that you placed on your board. Just think about all the taxes and copious amounts of cleaning you’re being spared. Use your board as a focal point to inspire your soul and motivate you to accomplish your goals and continue to dream about what’s possible.
3. If something isn’t perfect, it’s not meant to be. Sometimes things are going to be super easy and feel “meant to be” and other times you may feel like you’re fighting tooth and nail for what you want. Just because something isn’t easy doesn’t mean you should quickly walk away. God ultimately shows us what’s not meant to be, we must trust in that higher wisdom always present in our lives. When you’re headed in the wrong direction, you can often feel it in your heart. Or you end up being strongly re-directed. It’s hard to deny when something isn’t meant to be, you’re usually not given much of a choice. This divine wisdom asks us to eventually accept when life doesn’t go our way. There’s always a reason why something works out and why something doesn’t. We just have to trust. Trust helps the soul feel at peace and helps you hear your intuition clearer. Consider making a commitment to something you feel strongly about and working through it, even when it’s challenging, because it’s those hard times that can build trust and a loving relationship for a lifetime. Or a career that you become really good at, enjoying success from your efforts and helping many people. Avoid the ego trap of striving for and expecting perfection. Practice acceptance for what is, and strive to be the healthiest you. Change what’s in your power and commit to a positive outlook. Life may not be perfect in your perception, but from the higher view, it’s always perfect on that deeper level.
4. A spiritual person doesn’t ever do anything that would upset anyone. Gentle, sensitive souls who are striving to be the most loving, kind and compassionate people may find themselves feeling stepped on in life. It’s the sensitive souls who end up becoming doormats for stronger personalities who mistake their gentleness for weakness. Sensitive people often focus so much on the idea of being viewed as “good” that they behave in ways that are actually bad for them. A friend of mine once said “us sensitive people have a higher tolerance for BS.” It’s true that a deeply compassionate heart is often open to everyone and will tolerate a lot others wouldn’t. We just have to be aware of the fine line between caring for others and caring for ourselves. If your own dignity, self-respect and health suffer as the result of you being a spiritual person, it may be that you’re using compassion as an excuse to avoid healing your self-esteem. Where is the strength of our compassion if we’re lacking it for ourselves? It’s a sure way to burn out.
Consider spiritual street smarts. You can do good and feel good, but you need to be discerning. There are people out there who won’t see your loving heart and just don’t care. They’ll use, abuse, take you for granted and take advantage of your goodness. There are people out there who would prefer you be meek and suppress your own feelings so they could feel in control. There are times you may unintentionally offend someone by sharing your personal belief about something. You can’t be a yes man to everyone without sacrificing your own health and well-being. It’s not healthy to be consistently kind and giving and then start feeling resentful when certain people aren’t kind or giving back to you.
You can shine your light in the world without leaking it out in a way that undermines your strength and power. Even the angels practice tough love. Angels are created of pure love but they’re far from doormats. They just say no to fear and actively clear it with a very strong, very powerful, very focused divine love. It’s not a romantic or friendly love. There is no personal agenda, and there’s none of that sentimental kind of love we humans feel. It’s divine love – something that’s hard to explain in human terms. Divine love feels synonymous with respect for all living things. This love doesn’t fall prey to guilt or rationalizing. This love is clear between the boundary of love and fear. It’s mission is maintaining a strong divine love and practicing zero tolerance for fear.
We can do the same by not being afraid to express ourselves, forgiving ourselves when we act out of fear, and by practicing our loving kindness in a way that feels comfortable to us. When you stop worrying what others will think of you, you will begin to live the kind of spiritual life that feels right for you. Gandhi, Martin Luther King, Jr., Mother Theresa and other spiritual leaders in our time have served as examples of standing your ground and speaking your truth without allowing the fear of others opinions sway you from your life’s purpose.
5. If you haven’t met your soul mate, you’re doing something wrong. This is another one I’ve heard from clients over the years and it always saddens me because these are kind, smart, beautiful people who feel they’re somehow blocking the love of their life from crossing their path. As an intuitive, I’ll tell you from years of providing hundreds of readings, I’ve seen enough proof to believe that we have little external control over our love destiny. We can’t control when our soul mate will be ready for us, or when that timing will be best for both of us. Does that mean you should sit home in your pajamas every weekend and not bother putting any effort into your dating life? No! You’ve got to put the vibe out there that you’re ready for love. You can do this by joining an online dating site, letting friends and family know you’re looking, being bold and taking risks. The love of your life is out there somewhere and you’re destined to meet.
The universe can use your help. Your psyche was erased of the date you’ll meet, so your love life is now an adventure. You play the game by searching and wondering and pining, and chances are your soul mate is doing the same thing. Then one day, exactly when it’s meant to happen, you’ll meet. It could be online. It could be at a support group or yoga class. It could be in a coffee shop. It could be at the gym, or maybe through a friend. The greatest challenge of love is waiting for it. The wait will challenge your mind with all sorts of depressing thoughts, like you’ll always be alone or you’re doing something wrong. The best thing you could do while waiting is continue to focus on your own personal development and opening your heart so when that destined encounter happens, you’ll be receptive with a grateful heart.
Yoga props are essential to a healing and relaxation practice. Yoga props provide relief to injured soldiers in our therapeutic yoga class at Fort Bragg not only physically, but also mentally and emotionally. Props help to relieve physical pain and pressure, allow you to modify poses to your individual need, can hit pressure points, support a calm nervous system and reduction of stress hormones. The props also work deeper, emotionally, to regain trust and calm for the inner self, as well as the outer world. The props allow you to receive unconditional support. Receiving this kind of gentle, yet strong support can be very profound in body, mind and spirit during stressful times or when healing from trauma.
But yoga props aren’t only for times of stress. Using props regularly in your relaxation practice provides on-going support in your daily life. A soldier in my class remarked that he couldn’t comfortably get into a spinal twist without the support of a blanket. I said to him, “who doesn’t need a little support now and then?”
Really, who can’t use a little extra support along with feelings of peace and comfort? Try yoga props for deeper relaxation and healing. It’s a worthwhile investment for your self-care. I love my yoga props and look forward to using them routinely.
Make time for YOU, the investment pays off in joy and abundance
1. Be honest with yourself. What’s most important to you during your day? What are you presently making more of a priority than what you’re really being called to do? What are your fears?
2. Break the spell of thoughts. Over-thinking is a great way to block yourself from taking action. The more you think, the more thoughts will come. You could find yourself, an hour later, still not doing anything. Avoid getting lost in your thoughts by making them work for you. Grab your laptop or a notebook and start writing down inspiring thoughts that support your goals. Other “to-do” thoughts, write in a planner or separate piece of paper so you can relax, knowing you won’t forget those little things. Then bring your attention back to your goal. Try a quiet meditation to clear and re-direct your mind to what’s important.
3. Do something different. Sometimes a routine can block inspiration. Doing the same thing, day in and day out, can make you feel stuck. Break the cycle by doing things differently. Get out of the house and drive someplace new. Try a new adventure, go someplace you normally wouldn’t. Do something you normally wouldn’t. Move around your furniture. Clean your car out. Try a new exercise. Read a new book. Throw out or donate clothes you haven’t worn in ages. Buy some flowers or a new candle in a scent you’ve never tried before. Buy or make an inspirational sign to hang in your home where you can see it every day. Fresh new experiences bring in fresh inspiration!
4. Make it a habit. Whatever it is you’re wanting to do, you’ve got to make it a habit just like brushing your teeth. You don’t give yourself an option when it comes to brushing your teeth or showering, right? Hopefully it’s been groomed into you since childhood! View your goal as good hygiene for your well-being. It keeps you clean of the frustration and guilt you feel when you’re not doing what you know is good for you, and washes off any fear since you’re taking action and doing it. Once your goal becomes a daily habit, you won’t think twice about doing it. It will no longer feel stressful like something you’re trying to squeeze into your day. Once you make your goal a natural inclusion in your day, you’ll find you have enough time every day to devote to yourself. You’ll allot whatever time you can – 5, 10, 15 minutes, an hour, to whatever makes you feel happy and more at peace, and helps you accomplish your goal.
5. Visualize the results. Use your imagination to visualize what you look like and what it feels like when you’re doing what you love to do, and when you fulfill that promise to yourself. This is a calling you have – what does it feel like to be living it? Notice the effects it may have in your life – both personally and professionally. Anytime you feel distracted or discouraged, come back to this visualization and feel as if you’ve already been engaged in what you desire. Then follow through by physically doing it.
One of the many beautiful peacocks that roam the Aloha Zoo in North Carolina
“We Bought A Zoo” is a movie based on a true story about a widowed father who buys a shanty zoo with the hope of a fresh start. I haven’t seen the movie yet, but I have seen another real life story of a man who bought a zoo. And it’s in Cameron, North Carolina.
Just two years ago, Lee Crutchfield opened Aloha Zoo on 60 acres of Southern land, tucked off a highway, behind a row of mobile homes, on a quiet country road. He has adopted 300 exotic animals who were discarded by their owners. His zoo is a sanctuary for the unwanted, the lost, the sick, the elderly and the homeless. He provides them with their specialized diet, freedom to roam, a clean and protective environment and most importantly, love. Lee shared with us just a few of the stories that brought some of the animals in. Like the 100-year old parrot who survived two generations of family owners before being handed over to the zoo because the last owner, in his late 80’s, was too old to care for it any longer. The parrot, who from age, has lost a good amount of his feathers and had a slight tremble despite the heat lamps, looked content. Lee said he had bonded with the parrot he was perched next to, after his parrot “wife” had recently passed away.
He also explained how the lion’s bloody paws were due to dermatitis and an autoimmune condition most likely brought on by in-breeding by some circus owners and heartless profit mongers. The lion is under the care of a veternanarian. Lee is also open to holistic medicine, desperate to heal the regal cat. We witnessed the African lioness and her Siberian tiger companions purr and enjoy a head rub from two of the volunteers. It was heartwarming to see these gigantic cats acting like little house cats with the joy of their caretakers attention.
And then there was the bear who I’m sure is certified to teach yoga in the wild. I watched him do stretches that you’d see in a yoga or pilates studio. Lee said like Winnie the Pooh, this bear has a sweet tooth and loves Twinkies.
We took a Safari ride. A John Deere tractor took a bunch of us animal admirers on a loop around the vast property where cattle, camels, pigs, zebras and a very humorous ostrich roam the pasture, greeting the tour with the hopes of getting fed. Our tour guide shared funny stories and interesting facts about the animals while we snapped photos and oohed and ahhed. She mentioned that you could tell by an animal’s eyes whether they’re kind or not. I thought, the same goes for people.
I witnessed so much playfulness from the bear and the tigers, and the camels and the horses. As tough as these animals are, they know how to have fun. They recognize the importance of preserving energy and enjoying it. They would rest, exercise, practice awareness then want to play. Multiple species co-existed peacefully on the same land. What a great vision for life.
Activists Gone Wild
I was saddened to hear at the end of our visit that undercover PETA employees had falsely reported the Aloha Zoo to authorities. And though owner, Lee, is in the clear with his integrity, he admits it’s stressful to now be “on the radar” and harassed by PETA representatives who don’t support his mission. And they haven’t even taken the time to get to know the guy.
Without people like Lee, these exotic animals, who weren’t taken out of their natural habitat, but have been rescued, may not survive very long if left to fend on their own. Like the 50 birds that Lee took in from a widow who said she was just going to “let them loose” if he didn’t show up in 30 minutes to take them. Those exotic birds would have never survived a winter here. But I was blessed to see them, happily chirping away in the company of each other, well-fed and warmed in their tidy cages. And the humongous boa constrictor that a woman dropped off after her mother threatened to call child protective services on her because she had the carnivorous snake slithering around her floor along with her newborn baby. That decision may have saved a child’s life. If it weren’t for the Aloha Zoo, where in this desolate country would that snake have gone? Perhaps let loose in the wild to wreck havoc on the neighbors or kill someone’s pet cat. This man is not taking a life away from these animals, he is giving them a life, and love, they may not have had otherwise.
I believe in the role of activists and that we need people to take charge and speak up against corruption. But in cases like these, I begin to wonder if activists like those from PETA have become less about the highest good for all and more about their own ego attached to the mission which, it appears to me, has been founded on hate and distrust of humanity. Without compassion, activism loses it’s purity and can turn dark. Though I’m sure PETA has contributed lots of good to the world, some of their acts of activism have come across more like terrorism to me. Like just recently, I was in NYC and had to endure being yelled at in the face by PETA activists who were screaming at ladies entering department stores not to wear fur coats. I’ve never owned a fur coat. I don’t get why, with the myriad of warm fabrics we have today, anyone would want to wear a dead animal on their back. Not to mention the cruelty in the process, it is awful. You’re wearing the vibration/imprint of trauma, pain and suffering on your body when you choose fur. Did my sensitive ears need to be ringing with the activists rage that day? No. And although I agree with them that the making of fur coats is a vile business that should be stopped, attacking people about it is stooping down to the abusers level. I bet women who do like fur coats are certainly not going to stop wearing them just because a pack of wild humans are screeching at them like lunatics. If anything, she’ll write them off as crazies and buy the coat without her heart ever knowing what their anger was really all about. Graphic photos, red paint splashes – these kind of acts of guerrilla warfare only scare people. You can’t reach, and open, people’s hearts if you’re approaching them with fear and hate.
I vote for a more tame approach to shift the public’s perception of animal cruelty. Education, not manic harassment, is the answer. It starts with an education in how to be a more compassionate, empathetic person through recognizing your suffering in an animal’s suffering. It’s all the same, and we each have an opportunity through our deeds to add to the suffering in superfluous ways or to add to the healing in whatever small way we can. In the case of family and volunteer-run Aloha Zoo, I think Lee is an inspiration to us all for compassionate action. He is providing an education in compassion at his zoo, and living the example.
To volunteer or make a donation, please visit the Aloha Zoo website.
Lauralyn is a yoga and angel therapist® and Reiki Master specializing in holistic healing and intuitive spiritual mentoring. A transplant from Los Angeles, she is currently providing yoga therapy to the wounded warriors at Fort Bragg in North Carolina.
This meditation helps you release stressful feelings related to a job search, career change or starting a new business. The guided visualization is designed to help boost your confidence and motivation and leave you feeling calm, clear and positive about what you want and the direction you’re heading in. More meditations can be found on my website and are available to download for just a $1 donation. Enjoy!
Lauralyn is a certified yoga, reiki and angel therapist®. She specializes in holistic healing and intuitive spiritual mentoring. She is currently providing yoga therapy to the wounded warriors at Fort Bragg in North Carolina.
The medical dictionary defines addiction as “a persistent, compulsive dependence on a behavior or substance.” You may think addiction is limited to food, drugs or alcohol, but it can also be to a behavior or a habit that you just can’t let go of.
Fear is a powerful emotion. It’s intended to be a warning sign to support our survival on Earth. Back in the day, the fear response helped man run away from bear. These days, fear isn’t being used as for original intention, which is a positive, to help us survive. Fear now has been created as a daily ritual and reality in people’s lives. The message is “the world is a dangerous place” and it hooks people’s minds into believing that if they aren’t aware of every horrible thing that’s happening on our planet, then they will somehow be in danger. Just like other addictions, fear slowly begins to destroy trust.
The addiction to fear involves the nervous system and fight or flight response. It is possible for the body to get hooked on the “high” stress hormones such as cortisol and adrenaline provide. These stress hormones can be powerful enough for a parent to lift a car to save his or her trapped child. But what happens when you’re not using these hormones for emergency situations? You begin to get addicted to the high without a real threat present. Similar to a person who gets addicted to painkillers long after the pain has gone.
You can use the following twenty-one questions to discover whether you may be addicted to fear.
1. Do you feel compelled to read the news every day and feel drawn to the fear-based reports?
2. Do you often worry about what you’ve read or heard, even if it doesn’t relate to you?
3. Do you often worry that something bad will happen to you or a loved one that’s out of your control?
4. Do you keep the blinds closed, windows shut and double check locks when you’re home?
5. Do you often imagine the worst?
6. Do you feel a physical response to your fearful thoughts such as tingling, pins and needles, numbing, heart racing, trembling, dry throat or hot/cold flashes?
7. Do you focus on the negative of a situation and believe that you’re powerless over really changing anything?
8. When someone shares good news with you, do you find yourself feeling envious, jealous, angry or depressed?
9. Do you enjoy watching scary movies or violent TV dramas?
10. Do you often worry that people are thinking negatively of you, judging you or won’t like or accept you?
11. Do you feel failure so you won’t even try?
12. Do you avoid seeing a doctor because you’re worried you’ll get bad news or may even be sick or dying?
13. Do you fear that there’s something wrong with you and avoid reaching out getting support?
14. Do you have flashes of worse case scenarios running through your mind at random times like when driving, relaxing at home or when loved ones share things with you?
15. Do you fear you’ll be homeless, starve, will lose your job or some other security/financial fear even though every month your needs are presently met?
16. Do you find it hard to truly embrace feelings of safety and happiness, always feeling cautioned to prepare for when “the other shoe will drop”?
17. Do you often have nightmares?
18. Do you often have panic attacks? And have you ever feared that it was a heart attack?
19. Do you believe that if bad things happened in the past they are likely to repeat themselves even if you were to do things differently in the present?
20. Do you often imagine natural disasters?
21. Do you worry that you will lose a loved one unexpectedly?
If you answered yes to several of these questions, you may be addicted to fear. Like any addiction, the best way to heal it is to change your thoughts and behavior. Street smarts and premonition aside, if your brain is signaling off fear on a daily basis like loose, live wires, this constant jolt of negativity can take a toll on your health and well-being. Unless fear is being used for it’s natural purpose: in an emergency situation or to save your life, it needs to be dropped like a bad habit from your daily routine.
Surrender the need to get the high fears gives you, and instead begin to practice positive habits that give you a healthier high: feelings of bliss and true relaxation. Positive affirmations, uplifting music, yoga, prayer, meditation and other forms of mind/body exercises can help you gain control over your mind again and start producing health-enhancing thoughts and behaviors that allow you to see, and experience, the peace, love and beauty that’s all around you.
Please note: if you’ve experienced a traumatic or disturbing event at any point in your life, a qualified health care professional can help you heal. Do not assume time heals all. Self-care, not denial, is the true healer.
Lauralyn is a yoga, reiki and angel therapist® specializing in holistic healing and spiritual mentoring. She is currently providing yoga to the wounded warriors at Fort Bragg in North Carolina.
